


Breathing

by MonochromaticMatt



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Dissociation, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-25 03:15:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14967941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonochromaticMatt/pseuds/MonochromaticMatt
Summary: Kei can't stop thinking about his best friend.





	Breathing

**Author's Note:**

> This is an admittedly sort of poor drabble I wrote because I felt disconnected from my breathing and decided to channel it into something mildly productive. I hope to finish some better fics I have in the process, but here's my debut I suppose...

Kei felt disconnected as he studied his own breathing. His chest rose and fell, steady, but seemingly out of sync with his rapidly beating heart. This had been happening often, lately, as his thoughts drifted to his best friend. 

He'd thought back to how Yamaguchi had stuttered out an answer to their teacher during class that morning, clearly nervous that he would be incorrect (he wasn't,) but it had caused Kei’s heart to give a stutter of it's own.

_Adorable,_ Kei thought as he'd listened to Yamaguchi. _So adorable,_ he'd thought as his mind drifted into mental snapshots of the boy's freckles, sprinkled across his cheeks, over his shoulders, down his back.

He was reminded of powdered sugar: sweet, but so, so, soft. He could easily imagine that he'd feel that same softness if he were to gently slide his fingers down Yamaguchi's arm, before clasping their hands together, fingers intertwined. 

It was much the same feeling as he'd had the previous weekend, with Yamaguchi settled on Kei’s couch as they watched some poor excuse of a movie - one they'd just _had_ to watch, according to Akiteru - as Yamaguchi's breath pleasantly captured Kei’s attention. 

How he'd ached to run his hands over that chest, to feel Yamaguchi's heart beat beneath his palms, and perhaps to even feel his lips between his own-

No. Instead, he chose to just watch as Yamaguchi's body inhaled, then exhaled; steadily, unthinkingly, perfectly. 

And now, once again, he'd found himself watching his own chest, alone in his room. He wondered if the movement would ever calm Yamaguchi the way that Yamaguchi's calmed him. He couldn't imagine it would, not with how sporadic his heart was beating. The even rise and fall seemed so wrong considering how his breathing _felt_ like it was ragged and raw.

Kei wondered if Yamaguchi ever felt so disconnected from his own body, ever felt like it wasn't his own. He truly hoped not.

With a decisive sigh, Kei closed his eyes. It did him no good to watch his breathing if it wasn't going to calm his aching heart any. He would just have to find a way to sleep, regardless. 

He let his body drift further into bed and under the covers, eyes remaining tightly shut, as his thoughts wandered once more to the smooth skin and gentle voice of the boy he so greatly adored. If he tried hard enough, he could almost imagine Yamaguchi's arms around his shoulders, encouraging him to get some rest.

_‘Goodnight, Tsukki,’_ he would say, the words whispering coolly into his ears.

“Goodnight, Tadashi,” he whispered back, chest warming with the sound, coaxing sleep until his mind and body would align once again.


End file.
